Council Greenlights $22M Overpass to Ensure Safer Break-Ins at Bluff Point

City of Greater Geraldton commits to safer criminal commutes, funded entirely by ratepayers.

“Crossing a highway at night is dangerous enough — but when you're balancing a Samsung QLED and a leaf blower, it becomes a real workplace health and safety issue.”

The $22 million overpass will feature anti-slip ramps, soft lighting for better TV handling visibility, and reinforced handrails strong enough to rest a stolen Weber BBQ on mid-escape. Ratepayers will foot the bill, but council says residents should see the upside.

“Think of it as an investment,” said Mayor Karen Cockerill. “Safer crossings mean less roadkill, faster burglaries, and less disruption to traffic flow. Everyone wins, really.”

To further support the initiative, CGG has also hinted at installing solar-powered charging bays under the overpass to assist those struggling to get their cordless angle grinders to full capacity before their shift.

Local residents had mixed feelings about the project. One Kempton Street homeowner, who wished to remain anonymous, summed up the mood: “Look, if I’m gonna lose a flatscreen, I’d rather they don’t get hit by a road train and hold up traffic for two hours.”

Construction is expected to commence next February, just in time for the Easter crime season.